We are currently in a difficult time, where many of us are evaluating our goals, careers and personal lives. I wanted to end this decade and mark my 30th in the most epic way, but we all know what happened there. Instead, I’m sharing 10 pieces of advice for the 20 something year old. As I write this intro, I can’t help but review the last decade of my 20’s. Oh, how nothing went as I planned but somehow aligned with the goals I set for myself along the way. You see, young me had a dream of becoming the Black Carrie Bradshaw. Well actually, my dream started when I watched a popular movie called “13 Going on 30“. I wanted to be that boss chick creating the best marketing campaigns you see around the world.
I take time to connect with that young voice within me to make sure she is happy with the direction we are headed. And when she is not, we revisit goals and re-brand where it is necessary. I am constantly learning, and as I walk into my thirties I also plan to challenge myself in more areas that need work. So now, here are my 10 pieces of advice for the 20 something year old…
10 pieces of advice for the 20 something year old
- Do it Now, You won’t Have Time Later
Let me explain. Yes, it’s never too late but as you grow older you become more risk averse; I know because I’ve felt it starting. I believe a lot of us are lead by fear, but we are all lead in different ways. Some people use fear as a guide, showing them where to go. Fear of the unknown, it either drives you towards it or away from it. When it comes to dreams and goals. Every time you are to start something new, you’re filled with emotions, one which is fear. The younger self is risk taking, and is able to see so many benefits of such risks(or maybe has nothing to lose); while the older is more guarded, and less risk taking(calculating). Just do it, and do it now!
- Date to Learn Yourself & What you want
The best piece of dating advice I’ve probably gotten in my 20’s was to date in order to learn what I do and don’t want in a partner. I can’t say I’m the most fond of dating these days, but meeting and dealing with people different from you grows you as a person. Which brings me to my next point.
- Don’t be afraid to Shoot your Shot
I can’t say enough how this little blog has helped me both personally & professionally. In my industry, it’s important to be in touch with all new ways of communicating so this little blog helped me stand out in interviews. On top of that, it has done everything I intended it to do and more. Teaching me how to reach different demographics, understanding a generation(s), becoming a market expert and beyond. I met so many amazing people and also shot my shot at companies and gained sponsorships for my blog as well as events. It all started with me just going for it, shooting my shot!
- It’s Okay to Start Over
Whether it be about career or dating, it’s okay to reevaluate and start over if needed. I experienced 2 back-to-back lay offs in my 20s, which forced me to change industries, start over and even take pay cuts. And you know what? That was all part of me exploring and learning about what I want, and value in an employer.
- Learn your flow, and lean into it
Society will try to tell you how your life should look, but what matters more is how you want your life to look. So take time to learn and explore yourself in your 20’s and truly discover what you want out of life and your surroundings. So go ahead and make that restaurant reservation for 1; ask questions without judgement and truly seek to find out why you have the beliefs that you do and do the things that you do. We’re all forever learning, so it’s good to get good within.
- It’s Ok to be Selfish
It might have been once, but I was called selfish once. But you know what, your twenties are supposed to be a time for you to be selfish as you explore, discover and grow into yourself. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad for focusing on yourself and your future, because you know what? You’ll be better off in your older years knowing you explored and learned.
- Dream Boldly
When we’re young, we have crazy ideas and have this relentless idea that we can achieve those dreams. Connect to that young voice within, the one that sees great potential in things. Keep that flame of passion alive within yourself, because that’s the part of us that makes all the difference. Never give up on a dream. Many life events or people will try to deter you from your dreams, some for good and others for selfish reasons. Don’t settle but be open enough for chance, be open to having to take responsibility for your decisions. You will find yourself caught between a battle of the dreams of your mind vs. the dreams of your heart.
- Seek Balance in Everything
This is my motto, and I’m constantly living it and learning to live in it. To me, it is important to have balance in life. Too much of anything can kill you; whether it is demanding work-life-balance, balancing eating/drinking habits, health or money spending.
- Be Open…Leave your comfort zone
Whoo, let me tell youuuu…haha. I spent my twenties getting uncomfortable, like so uncomfortable. And it was in those moments and times where I grew and learned the most. The comfort zone is so safe and easy, but nothing really happens or grows there. Be open to taking risks, and making a few sacrifices. You’ve got to get out of your comfort zone in order to grow; one is your nature and the other are built habits. Sometimes you’ve got to stretch outside of those areas in order to grow as a person and become a better you in general. One of them is easier to expand than the other but they can both be stretched and expanded upon. I totally encourage you to give it a try for personal, professional, spiritual, emotional growth or whatever else.
- Cherish & Hold on to Your Loved ones
This is personal to me, because I highly value my family & friends. It’s so hard to make a great group of friends as an adult, with moving and fading/outgrown connections. Spend time building friendships with supportive, challenging and inspiring people. I am currently still building my tribe, but I have made a great group of women who have forced me and challenged me to grow outside some of my little bubbles.